Monday, August 17, 2009

Hell Week Begins: Day 1

Ok folks, back from a week of travel, well rested thanks to a day of honest-to god-thunderstorms on Saturday and ready for Hell Week. Bring on the puking, I'm ready!

Maybe I should explain.

In college, the week before exams was called "dead week". This, as we all know, was for two reasons: a) because life was cancelled except for studying (meaning, things were 'dead') and b) for those of us who were diligent; the hours we put in studying liked to kill us.... or b.2) For those of us who didn't put those hours in studying, I guess you could say we spent dead week digging our own grave. I, being the brilliant and supportive spouse that I am, bailed and went to Minnesota for dead week. You see, DHB takes his board exams this Wednesday and Friday. We call this 'hell week'.

I must admit, I was a little unimpressed with the twin cities area. However, when I spent 4 or 5 hours meandering through the back roads of southern Minnesota into Wisconsin along the Mississippi river.... gorgeous. (alas, I digress, this entry isn't about me... more on this as soon as my photos are available).

So, dead week is down and hell week begins today. Here's my three part strategy: 1) Junk food, 2) keep my head down, 3) mindless television.

1) DHB could out chocolate me on the worst hormonal day of my life. Its really like living with a bulimic only more compulsive and without the purge. In anticipation of this I have collected the following: Ghirridelli triple chocolate with extra chocolate inside brownies, one dozen chocolate iced donuts from the bakery, mini chocolate iced donettes (for easier portability and less guilt when eaten en mass) One pound of Reasen chocolate candies, Cakesters, and chocolate syrup. I still have to get the 'pot of chocolate' from the chocolate shop run by dwarfs down the street (no, I do not jest) and some filler (like potato chips and mountain dew). If I'm missing anything let me know.

2) Keep my head down: Yeah, I haven't really gotten this one as worked out yet. I'm knitting under a deadline... maybe that will help? I'm open to suggestions. Will probably need to solicit your assistance on this one.

3) Mindless television: This one is really to keep him from calling out the names and characteristics of various disorders in his sleep. Lets face it, its both disruptive and disturbing. I had a great solution to this: Dexter. (DHB is to violence as DHB is to chocolate) Problem is, I really don't think I can handle Dexter anymore (no clue when I became such a wuss, but I think it was the addition of Jimmy Schmitz). We've been through all of the original CSI's on demand (none of the NY or Miami crap) and DHB just doesn't have the same affinity for HGTV's If Walls Could Talk that I do. So... I'm thinking season three of Everest. Something mindless to suck us in and tune us out for 5 more blessed days.

So.... more than anything, I suppose this is simply a heads up, a plea for support and part one in what promises to be a very entertaining series of blogs. If you have any coping mechanisms to share, please, by all means don't hold back!!!

Wish us luck!



kvlm said...

1) I think the chocolate place will probably do you right. Pinwheels are one of my all time favorite cookies as are Grasshoppers, if you want a dwarf of a different tune. And those Ghiradelli squares....dear G-d.

2)I recommend Twilight. Yes, I am a dork.

3) We 86'd cable but we were addicted to Whale Wars. I highly suggest as a) you are both kind of hippies at heart and b) you both like to get on your political soap box. Hours of entertainment. (oh, plus c) the ocean. duh.) The History Channel's African Expedition also addictive. And both will probably fulfill his violence quota.

Lauren said...

So much I could say, seeing as how this is my first visit to the new blog. But most of what I would say wouldn't be productive or meaningful in your time of need (more so rambling and reminiscent-like "OMB Bodhi...I so know what you mean when our girl just plops down on the ground without any explanation!").

What I can add that may be helpful is this: bicycle helmet. Get your man a bicycle helmet.

I did some of my best studying for the NC Bar Exam sitting on the couch in the den wearing my bicycle helmet. Nope - wasn't riding my bike. Nope - wasn't just sitting beside the helmet. I was strapped in, ready for the ride.

Comforting? Maybe. Ridiculous? Of course. Only happened once? Not a chance. It happened multiple days in a row.

Perhaps it had something to do with keeping all my good thoughts within close reach so I could formulate answers to practice essay questions or play a hearty game of alphabet soup with multiple choice questions. Who knows. We will likely never know.

So embrace the insanity that is before you, because, with all due respect, this is the shit you guys have been waiting for over the last several years, but more importantly, the last 17 mos. 23 days 5 hours 41 minutes and 28 seconds. I remember the day (although the estimate as to how long ago it actually was is likely way off) that you told me Hunter had started studying. He had a study schedule, indeed. I fully anticipated you to say it was for some exam that was in 3-4 months. Imagine my surprise when I learned it was more than a year (year and a half?) away!!

In all seriousness, the pain and pressure in the next 72+ hours is nothing compared to the amount of relief you will both feel when it's all over.

You can do it. And so can he. No doubt about it.

Keep on keepin' on. And hollah back soon ma'am.

<3, May